These days there is no more a sense of pervading happiness. As I am consumed by the everyday, it has become more about the toil than the pleasure derived out of it. There is a vague sense of fulfillment somewhere, but it is a disengaged perception of having moved a step closer to the smaller finite. The larger goal still remains elusive. Everything is tangible and everything is fleeting. Emotions more so.
Ireally don't know why I sound so low whenever I am writing. It's just weird. I am not such a sad person generally. I really have the ability to cheer people up. But I think I fail to cheer myself up because I want so many things at the same time. I want to imbibe so many things in my words that the true intention gets lost. I really need to make up my mind about a lot of things. Stuck in a limbo far too long. I am an optimist just as much I am a cynic. I just need a better social life to do well.
No, I think I need more hours in my day to actually feel alive. I want to study and gather knowledge, laze around, go out, make out, travel and discover, and spend time with my friends all in one day. It is asking for too much but I think last year I did manage to achieve something similar to it. 2014 feels like a fake hourglass. Because there is never time! I am stuck doing things which doesn't keep me happy.
To speak of dreams, I want to travel. Alone. Or with a ghost of a company; to have people who are there with me but more so, lost in their own world. But every clock that ticks is a reminder of the recklessness of my dream.
Sometimes I really worry that I live a thousand pasts, and no future. But I humor myself with the thought that many of us live the same bewitched life that I am living. And this is my tonight's show. My tonight's story
Ireally don't know why I sound so low whenever I am writing. It's just weird. I am not such a sad person generally. I really have the ability to cheer people up. But I think I fail to cheer myself up because I want so many things at the same time. I want to imbibe so many things in my words that the true intention gets lost. I really need to make up my mind about a lot of things. Stuck in a limbo far too long. I am an optimist just as much I am a cynic. I just need a better social life to do well.
No, I think I need more hours in my day to actually feel alive. I want to study and gather knowledge, laze around, go out, make out, travel and discover, and spend time with my friends all in one day. It is asking for too much but I think last year I did manage to achieve something similar to it. 2014 feels like a fake hourglass. Because there is never time! I am stuck doing things which doesn't keep me happy.
To speak of dreams, I want to travel. Alone. Or with a ghost of a company; to have people who are there with me but more so, lost in their own world. But every clock that ticks is a reminder of the recklessness of my dream.
Sometimes I really worry that I live a thousand pasts, and no future. But I humor myself with the thought that many of us live the same bewitched life that I am living. And this is my tonight's show. My tonight's story
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